a shrine to my former shrine

when i was younger, i, like many tween/teen girls, was rather boy crazy. (who am i kidding, really? i'm still pretty boy crazy.) i have had crushes on many boys who were actually in my life, like the one who in kindergarten slammed my face into the ground or the one in my ward who i swooned over every time he blessed the sacrament or came to home teach. but i, like many tween/teen girls, have also had many celebrity crushes. and i put their pictures on the wall above my bed so they would be near me always.

i got nostalgic for those good ol' days of shrine-making and magazine-hoarding when i was listening to the new incubus album last weekend. lead singer brandon boyd was on my wall, and i still think he is very attractive. and i love his voice and his music. he writes lyrics like "i dig my toes into the sand/the ocean looks like a thousand diamonds strewn across a blue blanket/ i lean against the wind/pretend that i am weightless/ and in this moment i am happy." listening to him the other day took me back to the days when i would listen to morning view and pretend i met the band and he fell in love with me. does that sound a little crazy? possibly. anyway, this was one of the swoon-worthy pictures taped to my wall.

anyone remember the magazine ym? i forgot about it until today.

also this one.

whew. love that guy. and apparently he likes to go shirtless. sorry about that, guys. so anyway, thinking about brandon boyd reminded me of all the other unreachables who made my wall. there was tom welling, of smallville fame.

heath ledger in the poster for a knight's tale. i ripped this out of a magazine and put it up on my wall.

what girl growing up in the 90s didn't have a huge thing for jtt? i sure did. i ate up those teen magazines like tiger beat if only for the full size posters of him and devon sawa. and i'm pretty certain that this ad graced my wall at some point. that hair!

of course, hanson. and, though i loved them even when they had long, somewhat-greasy-looking hair, i loved them even more when they cut their hair and started dressing with some style. i had many a late night, dancing and singing in front of my mirror, pretending i went to one of their concerts and they saw me and i joined the band and eventually zac fell for me.

i don't put pictures of hot celebrities on my wall anymore, maybe because i don't spend quite so much time thinking about hot celebrities anymore. times were simpler then.

not sure if this really warrants a good title

i'm in the mood to blog, so i figured i would just jot down a couple of the things i've been thinking about/doing in the past couple of days.

yesterday and today we had a massive harry potter marathon. we started the first movie yesterday morning at 10 and finished the last movie in the theater today at 6:30 pm. it was awesome. i probably won't watch any movies for the next few days, but it was pretty cool to, one right after the other, see all the movies and how the actors change and what becomes more relevant later on. and the last movie was just as good the second time. i pretty much want to watch it everyday. i'm still not ready to quit harry potter mania. so i won't for a few more weeks.

i finally finished grading rhetorical analyses. nothing more to say about that. on a related note, only two more weeks of class this summer term.

as my post on saturday intimated, i taught on sunday about the resurrection, and it reminded me how amazing the second coming will be. even more incentive to do what i'm supposed to be doing here.

and, finally, here's what i'm listening to right now.

good night :)

i want to ride my bicycle, i want to ride my bike

i can't ride a bike. i maybe shouldn't be making this so public since i often use this as one of those "two truths and a lie" statements that could possibly stump someone, because how often do you come across a 23 year old girl who can't ride a bike?

but i digress. i've never had a desire to ride a bike, especially after that incident where i was riding down the slightly-sloped sidewalk in front of our house and my chain fell off and i didn't know what to do and i just kept going faster and faster until i ran into our neighbor's van which was parked out into the sidewalk. and then i was too embarrassed to tell anyone about it so it seemed like i just inexplicably left the world of bicycling and never looked back. my mom used to ask me what i would do if, at some point in the future "at college," some boy wanted to take me on a bike-riding date. and i said, well, i wouldn't go on a date with that boy, then. because why would i want to date some bike fanatic if i can't ride a bike? i was also skeptical that such things as "bike dates" actually existed.

in the past few months, though, i've felt a growing desire to get back on the bike. i'm not sure why. seriously, i've never felt like anything was ever missing in life due to my lack of bike skills. but now i'm feeling it. i want a cute little beach cruiser with a basket that i can ride through the streets of provo. i guess i want to become one of those bike people that i have thus far scorned.

my one stipulation is that i don't really want anyone to teach me. i just want to get access to a bike and go somewhere secluded and teach myself. i know if someone tried to teach me one or both of us would get frustrated and embarrassed (well, probably i would get embarrassed) and it would once again turn me off to two-wheelers. i think i could catch on and teach myself if i just had some time. so if anyone has a bike they'd like to donate to my cause for a few hours one day, let me know.

so there you have it, world. you got me. i want to be a bike rider.

saturday doings

there's not much that could be better than spending a saturday afternoon thinking and reading about the resurrection of Jesus Christ. and that study has led a lot of other good stuff, like buying new jenny phillips music on itunes and rediscovering mormon messages, like this one based around my favorite favorite talk.

life is pretty good. it's good to remember that every once in a while. or all the time.

much deserved harry potter post

so, it's over, i guess. and it's taken me a few days to write this post, maybe because i've been in denial. (or maybe because i've just been busy doing other things.)

anyway. i saw the last movie on friday afternoon with little bro carter, which was lovely, because we both love HP and we didn't even have to stay up until all hours of the night and suffer from (further) sleep deprivation. i do wish berg could have come though--dang girl's camp! i pretty much knew i was going to lose it through the course of the movie. and i did. as soon as harry and the gang stepped back into hogwarts for the big search and battle, i was a goner. i bawled through the rest of the movie.

i've talked to some people since friday, though, and they were saying that this last movie didn't have as much of an emotional pull on them, or at least that, if they did have an emotional reaction, it was based on their own feelings about the series, not necessarily how the movie was making them feel. i guess that's a valid point. much of my reaction was based on how much i love harry potter and how crazy it is that i've basically grown up with it and now these kids are all grown up too and now it's over. but then i realized that i don't really care if it was the movie or if it was just me. the movie and the series are still awesome, and i don't think my feelings are going to change all that much even without the buildup of seeing the last movie on its opening day.

thinking about harry potter over the last couple weeks has reminded me just how great literature is and how much i love it. i mean, specifically, i love harry potter. (have i said that already?) j.k. rowling is amazing and i want to meet her someday. and i'm interested to see what will go down and come out with this whole pottermore thing. but, in general, how awesome is it that a series of books inspired all of this craziness? literature can do pretty amazing things. i know that my kids are definitely going to be reading harry potter.

another plus is that, after i watched all the movies, my thoughts were totally in a british accent. gotta love it!

and look how crazy this is!

they were so adorable and little, and now they're all big and grown up. i hope they all turn out okay and don't do dumb stuff. because that would be sad.

and, the biggest surprise of all: neville is hot! who would have thought he would be the most attractive of the hogwarts guys?

wow. i have a newfound love for neville. although he is pretty great in the last book. and i'm glad the movie kinda hooked him up with luna at the end. they are both awesome.

so, even though the last movie is out and everything is technically "over," i for one am not going to let harry potter mania die. people are still going to have to listen to me talk about the books and the movies and how much i love them and how awkward daniel radcliffe is whenever he kisses anybody.

thanks for the memories, j.k.

not one of my best ideas

it may have been a mistake to immerse myself in harry potter this week. not only does it make me want to avoid everything i actually need to do, it's also making me really sad and nostalgic.

i'm still trying to sort it all out, and i think harry and ol' j.k. deserve a proper post, so more on this later.

a summer list

things i love about summer:
longer days
sundresses
swimming
beautiful sunshine
summer tv programming
time to read
open toed shoes

things i hate about summer:
bugs and bug bites

the itching woke me up in the night. it's miserable.

revisiting a beloved childhood movie

i've had "a little princess" in my netflix queue for awhile now, and, since i'm bad at sending my discs back, i hadn't looked at it in a few months before last week. so when i went on to check my queue and remove some stuff (since doctor who series 5 is on watch instantly :)), i noticed that that movie is now available to watch online too.

i vividly remember watching "a little princess" when i was younger. it wasn't one that was basically on a loop in our vcr, like "the little mermaid", but i definitely remember thinking it was beautiful, magical, and also very heart-wrenching. if you aren't familiar with the story, originally a book by frances hodgson burnett, take a look at the wikipedia page, though apparently the book differs in a couple key ways from the movie.

so anyway, last night i decided i was going to watch it, and, as it had been a few years (the last time i remember watching this movie i was just about to go babysit and had been bawling by the end when the mom picked me up...a little embarrassing.), it was interesting to watch with a few new insights.

first, sara is all about imagination. she is a really good storyteller and befriends all the girls in her school through her stories. miss minchin, the mean headmistress, keeps telling her that the real, cruel world (it does take place during world war I, i guess) has no place for imagination and fancy. but sara knows that isn't true. in fact, using her imagination is how she makes the best of the cruelties of life.

also, sara is always talking about how all girls are princesses. how awesome is that? when she first comes to school, she looks like a princess; she has fine clothes and toys and her own huge suite. but later, when she has almost nothing, she still believes she is a princess and acts like it. not in a spoiled way, though. she treats people kindly (when they deserve it) and doesn't discriminate for dumb reasons like skin color or looks.

and, of course, i was bawling by the end. this really is such a great movie and i can't believe i forgot about it for so long. i think i need to add this to the list of movies my kids need to see, along with old school nineties disney and newsies. i highly recommend it. now i think i need to go out and get the book :)

"you look like the fourth of july"

friday, after a long day of class and work, we peaced out of provo to head home for the independence day festivities. maybe one day i will stay in p-town to experience firsthand whatever happens down there for the fourth, but the stuff at home is just so fun that it's unthinkable to miss it at this point.

i packed only red, white, and navy clothes for the weekend (tastefully and stylishly, i should add. i don't go around wearing sequined star-spangled t-shirts. not that there's anything wrong with that.). by monday, it maybe got a teesny bit old, but i still went with it because i love america and wanted to give it a good birthday.

so saturday we headed over to the golf course and our primo spot to watch the fireworks and the people who mill around before the fireworks. i wore my sunhat and sat in my beach chair. here are pictures.

we went to the golf course with one goal and one goal only: to emerge with new profile pictures.

a rousing game of apples to apples

mom and dad

a good time was had by all. i tried to take some pictures of the fireworks, but, alas, i have not yet mastered that technique (i'm not even sure anyone can master/has mastered that. but anyway) i LOVE fireworks. every year i kind of forget how much i love them since i haven't really seen them since last fourth of july (except at disneyland, where they are also gorgeous and magical), and then when they start i feel that same excitement and joy i felt when i was a kid watching them. this year a tiny bit of the excitement was squelched by the millions of people who were setting off their own fireworks all weekend long, but i guess that was to be expected.

sunday we ate a dutch oven dinner and i took a long nap, both of which were delicious. my mom's brother and his family are in town for a few days, so we've gotten to hang out and chat, too, which is always fun.

on monday we woke up extra early for the ward fourth of july breakfast, something of a tradition. the food is usually really good and this year we were having a four star general who happens to be in our ward speak to us about his feelings about independence day. and the four of us girls were singing the national anthem in parts, a capella. nbd. but everything went well and we had fun and ate good food  (read: we strategically stood in one line so we could raid mom's famous breakfast quiche. i don't think anyone else got to even try it :)) and thought about how awesome our country is. when we got home we got some stuff ready for our barbecue later (i made deviled eggs, my favorite bbq food) and then headed to park city to get in some outlet shopping. going there on holidays just reinforces how much i have been missing by neglecting the outlets so much since we moved up here. i bought a new swim top, some new jeans and yoga pants, some cute shirts, and pretty much everything was at least 50 percent off. love it! then we met up with some other beloved cousins and went up to the alpine slide, where i also ran into one of my students, who assured me that he was almost done with the paper that was due today haha.

we sing hymns from the hymnbook

some of the riders on the chair lift

a picture of a picture being taken. (sorry to that person whose butt this is.)

whew, monday was a long day. after park city we drove down to orem for the bq/swim party. we ate a delicious meal, swam in a lovely pool, went down an exhilarating water slide, and then ate a scrumptious dessert of cake and ice cream. and then it started to rain, but that was okay. by the time we got back to our apartment, meredith and i were both exhausted. but, all in all, it was a great, fun-filled, busy weekend and i'm glad i got to share it with my family.

happy birthday, america!

babies and such

today we got to go over and see our friend rebecca's brand new baby, annie, who is just ten days old. who would ever pass up a chance to hold a sweet little baby?

she was adorable and totally ready for the fourth with her summery white eyelet dress and teeny red hair bow. at one point while i was holding her i looked down and she had her eyes closed with this huge gummy grin on her face. so cute!

but anyway, this post isn't just about how cute and awesome babies are. i was struck as i was looking at this new, perfect baby by how amazing the whole process of life is. a few months ago, annie looked nothing like she does now, and in a few more months and years, she'll be even more different. right now she has everything she needs to be a physically functional person, like all of her fingers and toes and ears and lungs, but she'll learn so much as she gets older that will help her to be a good person. how cool is it that we grow and change throughout our lives? i mean, i can't believe how different my younger siblings are now, as they are entering young adulthood, than they were just a few years ago. i, for one, was really dorky and awkward a few years ago, so it's good for me that we learn and mature and generally (hopefully) get better as we get older.

i just can't imagine how incredible it will be to someday have my own children, my own little people that i will get to watch grow up and experience the world and figure out how to make their own way in it. it reminds me of those dedicated mothers of "african cats," layla and sita (everyone should see that movie if they haven't yet).

it's something to look forward to, anyway :)